Friday, May 10, 2013

What's in a name?






This past weekend was truly fun and memorable. We celebrated the naming of our 2nd daughter with friends and families and our community. The entire weekend was spent celebrating Maya, and formally giving Maya her Hebrew and secular names while our friends expressed their wishes for her. Since many of our families could not make it to the simchat bat, let me share the meaning and reasoning behind choosing her name. (Shoutout to our family & friends: if you are wondering about how we chose Tamar's name, pick up the phone, and we'd gladly tell you about it.)

 

"Meet Maya Emie Young Silverman. Her Hebrew name is Maayan Rivkah bat Eliyahu Asher (hubby's Hebrew name) v’ Chava Eliora (my Hebrew name).
 
 

We chose the name Maya because it is a word that is meaningful in both the Jewish and Filipino cultures. Maayan, Maya's Hebrew name means "spring". In the dry land of Israel, a spring is seen as a life-giving water, and as such, is often used to represent the bible with it's endless source of wisdom. So, the name Maya connotes thoughts of blessing, purity and renewal.

Maya was also the Philippine National bird when I was a child, until 1995, when it was changed to the Philippine Eagle, better known as the monkey-eating eagle. The President at that time decided to make the change because he thought that the regal Philippine Eagle more accurately reflected the nobility and majesty of the Filipino spirit. And yet… the Philippine Eagle is now endangered, while the diminutive Maya thrives. In my opinion, the tiny Maya better represents the Filipino spirit than the Philippine Eagle: small, sociable by nature, and resilient to changes and challenges posted by man and nature. Something we wish our little Maya would be like.

Emie. Our daughter is also named after my aunt Emie, or Tita Emie, who passed away in 2007. Tita Emie was my mom’s oldest sister. She did not have children of her own, but was a blessing to all her nieces and nephews. When she was alive, she lived here in the US and she supported many of her families back in the Philippines, making sure that they had food on their tables, clothes on their backs, and that the kids were able to attend school. She cared for us like her children. She walked with a quiet authority and wisdom; we never heard her raise her voice, and yet everyone listened when she spoke. When I went to graduate school in Florida, she was very concerned that I, fresh off the boat from the Philippines, would not know what to do. So, she flew with me and stayed with me for a couple of days to make sure that I had a bed and a phone set up, and that I knew how to, at the very least, cook rice. It was a sweet and motherly act. She was truly the most compassionate woman I have ever known.

Rivkah. Since my aunt was not Jewish, we chose Rivkah because of its sound and who Rivkah (Rebecca) is in the bible. And we couldn’t have chosen a more fitting name. Both women share the same strength and compassion. Rivkah, in the bible, is the wife of Yitzhak (Isaac). She gave water not only to Abraham’s servant, a stranger to her, but also to his camels, showing her kindness. She was a giving, selfless individual, and wise – if you are familiar with how the family saga unfolded.

So, Maya, may you be blessed with the selflessness, compassion, and wisdom as Rivkah and Tita Emie, the purity in spirit of the spring, and have the resilience and cheer of the maya bird. May every word you speak seem like a song and brighten the days of the people you meet."

 


 

Sunday, February 17, 2013

And then there were two

Wow. Shame, shame! I've been MIA from writing for over 2 months! While it was for a very, very good reason, let me amend that now.

SO... it has been a busy past couple of weeks. Contrary to the rumors that the earth has swallowed me whole, I, in fact, have given birth to my second daughter, Maya. And I've been immersed in the blissful period of bonding with my baby, albeit with frequent interruptions for diaper changes. 'Bliss' does not even begin to describe this time. I cannot stop kissing her; when I ought to be catching up on rest as she sleep, I find myself just staring at her in wonderment. 

One would think that after having a previous high-risk pregnancy and one child, I would be a pro at this point.  There ought to be no more surprises, no lessons right? Heck no! A big lesson I learned is this: there is no "by the book" even when it comes to your second pregnancy and child birth.  For one, people have said that second pregnancies and labors are a lot easier.  This was not my experience at all. Perhaps because I'm a bit *cough* older, all the bodily aches and pains, and nausea seem to be more unbearable this second time around.  As for the labor... Que horror! It wasn't fast, and it wasn't easy. I was in tears with every contraction before the epidural was administered. I was sooo tired too, and the minutes seem to drag on by that, I kid you not, I had asked my doctor for a rain check on giving birth. No dice, of course. (A special shout-out to my wonderful husband for not letting me escape, and for standing by me, and cheering me on, even as I almost broke his finger with my tight grip during the active labor!) 

On the emotional front, I've heard so many stories about how scared women are that they won't feel the same love for their 2nd as they did their first, only to (fortunately) find out how ridiculous this fear is. As for me, I never felt that fear. I knew even when Maya was still in utero that I would have no trouble loving  her.  I had other feelings - mostly guilt and inadequacy. I felt that I didn't sing/laugh/read/talk enough to Maya (in utero) as I did when I was pregnant with her ate Tamar. I felt guilty that I was so busy at work or running after Tamar that I was missing the baby's kick counts, jabs and other movements, which provided the simple joys for my 1st pregnancy. Towards the end, I felt bad that I could no longer lift my toddler because of my burgeoning belly. Seriously, I felt guilty that I didn't worry enough!! Crazy, right? Then Maya came out a healthy baby, tipping at 8 lbs and 5 oz, hungry and with a good set of lungs on her, and I knew that all those feelings were probably mostly hormonal; otherwise, they were all forgiven - by her and by me. So, yes, to expand on that lesson learned: pregnancy and child birth are such personal experiences no matter how many women you swap stories with, and in spite of sporting the same battle scars.   

Right off the bat, and even just based on a single grainy photo, everyone has started speculating on who  Maya looks like. I do see a lot of my first born's features on her. She even makes the same squeaks and snorts that Tamar used to make when she was a few weeks old. But she is Maya. She's good at sleeping and eating, and she is quite a calm baby. It's too soon to tell her eye color, but no matter if it's blue, brown, or black, she'll always be beautiful in my eyes. And did I mention she has gorgeous dimples?! 

As for Tamar?  She still takes my breath away each time she grins. I still cannot stop kissing her when she sits still long enough to let me kiss her. Now, there are two of them, and a lot of love to go around. A friend of mine put things in perspective for me when she said that having another child can be likened to lighting a second candle; It doesn't diminish the brightness of the first. 

And yes, my world just got a lot brighter. 




Monday, December 17, 2012

In memory of the innocent



        It's monday. A new week. Hannukah just ended, Christmas just around the corner, and the celebration of the new year 2013 follows the week after.  These ought to be festive times.  These ought to be hopeful times. But as I handed the last hannukah night's present to my daughter, I couldn't help but think about the children who were murdered in Newtown, Connecticut. As I stare at my daughter's lit up face, my heart weeps for the parents who are missing this moment, and would miss this moment come Christmas day. Their presents are probably all wrapped up, tucked away where the little ones couldn't peek at them. Olivia, Daniel, Dylan... I wonder what their little hearts desired for this season.
        Sleep little ones, and may your memories turn to blessings.

“In this sad world of ours, sorrow comes to all; and, to the young, it comes with bitterest agony, because it takes them unawares.” ~ Abraham Lincoln

Charlotte Bacon (2/22/06), 6 years old
Daniel Barden (9/25/05), 7 years old
Olivia Engel (7/18/06), 6 years old
Josephine Gay (12/11/05), 7 years old
Ana M. Marquez-Greene (4/4/06), 6 years old
Dylan Hockley (3/8/06), 6 years old
Madeleine F. Hsu (7/10/06), 6 years old
Catherine V. Hubbard (6/8/06), 6 years old
Chase Kowalski (10/31/05), 7 years old
Jesse Lewis (6/30/06), 6 years old
James Mattioli (03/22/06), 6 years old
Grace McDonnell (11/4/05), 7 years old
Emilie Parker (05/12/06), 6 years old
Jack Pinto (05/05/06), 6 years old
Noah Pozner (11/20/06), 6 years old
Caroline Previdi (9/07/06), 6 years old
Jessica Rekos (5/10/06), 6 years old
Avielle Richman (11/17/06) 6 years old
Benjamin Wheeler (09/12/06), 6 years old
Allison N. Wyatt (07/03/06), 6 years old
Lauren Rousseau (June 1982), Staff member, 30 years old,
Rachel Davino (7/17/83), Staff member, 29 years old
Mary Sherlach (2/11/56), Staff member, 56 years old
Victoria Soto (11/04/85), Staff member, 27 years old
Anne Marie Murphy (7/25/60), Staff member, 52 years old
Dawn Hochsprung (6/28/65), Principal, 47 years old
Nancy Lanza, 52 years old
Source: USA Today
 

Friday, November 30, 2012

Designer Babies: Boon or Bane?


Babies! Babies! That's what's on my mind lately. As I await the arrival of our 2nd one, I can't help but think over one question that a few people have surprisingly asked when I told them that we're not finding out the baby’s gender in advance. The question: Do you want a boy or a girl?
 
            The 21st century has brought us a kind of technological revolution that is befitting of a science novel's plot more than reality. Has any one of you read Aldous Huxley's A Brave New World? This futuristic book’s storyline revolves around designing children en masse, and subjecting them to conditioning at an early age to fit their class in society. Terrifying, especially since this future seems not too impossible. And to think that the book was written in 1931! With the aid of technology, we now have entered the age of genetic revolution where parents no longer have to wish for certain traits, but could potentially see them through. While you will not get any value judgment from me, let's give this topic some thought, shall we?


Hello, Dolly!
             I am sure that most of you have heard of cloning, and of Dolly the sheep who was the greatest banner man (banner sheep?) for this technique. What most people do not realize is that a clone is NOT an exact copy of the original. Unfortunately, when this word is uttered, people either think 1) "the end of the world is near, and we will be conquered by replicate beings à la Star Wars!!" OR 2) "Oh hey, I can bring back my most beloved hamster, Phosphorous!" Indeed, the first pet to be cloned was aptly named Copycat, or CC. Unfortunately, while CC is genetically identical to her donor, they are epigenetically different, giving CC a totally different look than her intended clone.


            Genetics is not as straightforward as some think, and many scientific uncertainties remain. A trait is the result of the interplay of genes. And, NO, you can't create a "master race" by designing babies through cloning because what you create are individuals. What then is the point of cloning? Clearly, it is geared for applied research. This technique can be used to regenerate brain cells for Alzheimer's disease, and could serve as a great alternative to transplantation with potentially lower risk of organ rejection.  Rest assured, no one is thinking of cloning individuals just to harvest their organs. With therapeutic cloning, DNA would be extracted from the person in need of a transplant to create embryonic stem cells that would be used to generate an organ that is a genetic match to the patient. But we’ll save the discussion concerning stem cells for another time.

            Aside from cloning, there are 2 other ethically charged areas in the age of genetic revolution. Preimplantation genetic diagnosis, or PGD, is also called embryo screening and involves the isolation of a cell to test for specific genetic diseases such as cystic fibrosis or Duchenne muscular dystrophy. The controversy, however, begins with this question: where do we cross the line? If we can detect for susceptibility to cancer, should we? How about deafness or dwarfism, or know if a child will die at the age of 5?

            Going further, germ line therapy allows science to physically change the genetics of embryos. In this era, science is not only discovering defective genes, but genes that influence personality, or genetic markers that suggest future characteristics or traits. Consequently, it could then be possible to influence how a child will turn out by screening their genes at the embryonic stage. Some would argue that creating designer babies is a moral obligation. When parents are given the choice to select against personality flaws, the children could grow up with better ethics and less likely to pose harm to themselves and those around them. Imagine if Adam and Eve had a chance to peek into the future, and an opportunity to curb Cain's angry personality? Do you think they would have gone this route? Would Hitler's parents have used this screen if they had the foresight to know that their son would cause the death of millions of Jews and non-Jews alike? If advocating for a screen that would allow the selection of offspring that will contribute to a peaceful society, would this choice mean responsible parenting? Or is it simply playing g-d? Obviously, this is an ethical minefield! 

            Don't start revolting just yet. At this point, germ line therapy can be performed on simple organisms like bacteria, but not on mammals. While most of us would like our children to turn up as geniuses, we do not know enough about genetics to select for intelligence. Just think about this – It is rumored that Al Capone's IQ (200) is higher than Netanyahu’s (180), Einstein's (160) or Bill Gates (160). If you were presented with these 4 embryos without a crystal ball, you would probably choose the one with the highest IQ. Sure enough, under the same environment, you could end up with a vicious mob lord for a son.

http://blog.lib.umn.edu/nich0185/myblog2/2012/04/iq-is-it-nature-or-nurture.html

*Published in Etz Hayim's Chronicle, December 2012 issue 
 

Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Exercise pill?

I follow a few science blogs and "like" a few science pages on facebooks. These people are pros at blogging and the sites have administrators that are quite the nerds! I say that with profound awe, not as an insult. I mean, some of these science bloggers are scientists during the day, and still they find the time to be writers at night or dawn or whenever. They're not paid to blog, mind you. They get paid with satisfaction from the exchange in the micro-community that they've created. Rants, rages, grievances, and occasional agreements are all there on the bottom comment section for everyone to read or snicker at. 
 
I know that the facebook sites are a bit different, and that they are managed by teams of individuals who are probably monetarily compensated. Still, where do they dig all those info? I'm grateful that as I take a break for lunch and park my brain on the social network, I am able to read about some interesting phenomena out there. Often times, I walk away scratching my head, thinking: "BUT WHY?" 
 
For instance, today I learned that researchers found that when the erythropoietin (EPO) hormone level in the brain is elevated in mice, they were more motivated to exercise. The Evolution page administrator goes on to ask whether a pill that would make you want to exercise harder isn't too far off in the future! Crazy, right? You can read the original article published here. But seriously, is this generation really too lazy now that we need to pop a pill to motivate us to exercise? Next thing you know we'll be looking for pills that would make kids want to study more and play video games less. Or pills to help us win the Tour de France!! .... Oh wait.